Saturday, 2 June 2012

Cara Sutra reviews 'Dirty Little Fuck Doll'

The highly respected Cara Sutra has taken the time to offer her opinions on my new book 'Dirty Little Fuck Doll'. Here's what she thought:

"The premise of Dirty Little Fuck Doll is a good one; insanely sexy, young nymphomaniac glamour model with epic proportions can’t go long without sex. There it is. Just a glorious festival of fucking, with beautiful people, beautiful scenes, porn-perfect characters and … lots of sex.

Unfortunately, I had to stop reading this book half way through. It could (and should) be a fantastic, erotic read. Due to poor proofing (please, learn how to properly place full stops and no, don’t place capital letters In The Middle Of Sentences For No Reason) and a disturbing amount of flowery, descriptive language, it just didn’t push my buttons. At all.

The author seems overly keen on two things. Long, drawn out sentences without proper placement of full stops, and describing every scene in such irrelevant detail that it detracts from the action. I was half way through the book and all our gorgeous protagonist had done was met a guy on a train, gone back to his pad and started to fuck him.

Sorry, but I need more drama, tension, friction. Gritty characters that have some essence of realism. Emotions! Not just two bodies mindlessly frottaging and penetrating because they just ‘can’t help it.’ Nor do I particularly care about the period style of a window, or door, or details of the garden that the bedroom overlooked.

Following possibly every male stereotypical fantasy going, Chloe is a glamour model, with fake tits, a rampaging nymphomaniac that pulls guys on the train then eventually can’t help but fuck him, suck his cock, walks around naked and begs him to have a threesome. Yawn.

I didn’t find anything particularly perverse in the book, other than how much reality I had to suspend to carry on reading page after page of poorly written yet somehow overly floral descriptions.

I’m disappointed that I didn’t find a Dirty Little Fuck Doll at all, in fact all that I found was a nauseatingly empty headed bimbo with legs akimbo.

If you like your erotica with less plot than a cheap porno (probably along the lines of Dirty MILF Lesbians with Big Tits 2), perhaps this book won’t disappoint. For anyone with an imagination, stay well away.


Ok, that's not a good review. In fact, as reviews go, it's about as bad as they get. But, there have been so many good reviews for 'Dirty Little Fuck Doll', I knew I had a bad one coming. Cara, I take your comments on board, they are gratefully received, and will help to make my next book (currently being written) a better one. Although it must be said that I do get the feeling that Cara just didn't like it!

In relation to her comments about my proofing, well I would invite Cara to drop me an email with some more specific information regarding those 'mistakes'. I had the manuscript proofread extensively, both by myself and others; all of us are avid readers, and university post-graduates.

However, I'm not about to start kicking back against her thoughts; but, I do think that she should have finished the book in order to form a full opinion. Cara herself claimed 'To have an opinion, one must first be in possession of all the facts' in her review of '50 Shades of Grey' by E.L.James, when discussing her intention of 'tossing it across the room in disgust'. Those people who have finished it, have left some excellent reviews on Amazon. I was delighted by the fantastic response that my book received, I spent so many long nights and days off working on the book. It was my life for the sixty-seven days that it spent between conception and publication. If there are elements of my work that Cara dislikes, that's through her own personal choice; I can assure every reader that there was not even a smudge on the page of one of my drafts that was not planned. If there are any potential readers that may be concerned over the quality of my writing, I would hope that you can see from the blog posts on this very site, that I am indeed in a very good command of the English Language.

Sometimes, it comes down to a matter of taste. One perfect example is my own frustration with Virginia Woolf. I adore her work 'A room of One's Own', yet cannot abide her more acclaimed novel 'Mrs. Dalloway', even though I desperately want to like it. One size does not fit all. Thankfully.

On the same day as posting her reflections on my book, Cara reviewed the fantastic Lula Lisbon's latest offering 'Back-Alley Slut', which Cara describes as ' Erotica about lesbians and BDSM? Yes please!' This is a book that I feel is far better suited to her tastes, and she rightly awarded Lula's book 10/10. On the back of her review, I am certainly going to download a copy, it does indeed look like a stimulating read.

However, despite Cara's opinions, I shall not be losing any sleep over her taste in books. 'Back-Alley Slut' is sitting at number 415,851 in the Amazon UK best seller list, with no reviews. 'Dirty Little Fuck Doll' is currently 14,651 with five reviews, and an average rating of 4.4/5.

Cara, I am sincerely disappointed that you didn't enjoy my book, and I trust that Amazon gave you a full refund. However, I hope that those of you have read and enjoyed my first venture into the fantastic world of erotica, will be interested in my new book; due out towards the end of June.

To buy 'Dirty Little Fuck Doll' on Amazon, click here
To buy 'Back-Alley Slut' on Amazon, click here
To view Cara's review on her website, click here

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